Skip to content
Mike Pence, Vice president-elect of the United States of America has today announced he will be the first Republican to have his brain entirely replaced with an idol of The Lord©.
The surgery will be performed by a crack team of priests after doctors declined to operate saying ‘Idolatry is forbidden in the Bible’.
The Lead priest stated:
‘The key step in making Brain to Cross transplants (B2C) possible is the ability to connect nerve fibers from the Crucifix to the native spinal cord’
Mike Pence is expected to make a full recovery with no decline in cognitive functioning.
Prior to being appointed ‘Evangelical cheerleader’ by Donald Trump Mr Pence was famous for not understanding what a scientific theory was.
He’s also a favorite of the billionaire Koch brothers who’s business models involve making the earth uninhabitable.
Pence also enjoys removing LGBT rights supporting the rights of business to deny service to people based on their sexuality.